Marriage Isn’t…

* This will be a series on the blog that will Lord-willing become a devotional book in the future. You can pray that these will pierce my heart as I write them and that the devotional book will come together as well. 

I am married to a wonderful man and I love him, but marriage isn’t…

Marriage isn’t there so I can make up for the wrong I’ve done by doing 10 good things later in the day.  Let me explain.  Yes, I don’t know everything perfectly much to my dismay.  So my dear sweet husband has to tell me sometimes things to improve upon or things that haven’t been done in a while and that need to be done.  When I hear these comments, I cringe.  I sulk for a while, I definitely don’t think they add to my day any!  But then I set apart in my head a few things that I can do to make up for the fact that I failed in that one area.  I might do extra things around the house or make his favorite dessert or write him little notes.  These are all good things in and of themselves, but not done with the heart attitude that I have when I do them.

My whole objective for doing these extra nice things is to make E pleased with me again.  I feel like if I can do more nice things than bad things, I won’t have failed as a wife. 

Am I the only one who ever does this?

So, the other day when this situation occurred again, I got a chance to voice this to E.  Through my tears (its a wonder to me that E evens understands what I’m saying) I tried to explain that I do the same thing with God.  If I don’t do my quiet time for a few days, I have a longer one on the weekend to “make up” for the ones I’ve missed.  Fill in the blank with many other “good things” I can do to make up for my sins.  Sorta like praying the rosary.

Friends, we can’t see God in this manner.  Our faithful God has already paid the price for our sins, once for all, and has provided the ground work for our salvation: the blood of Jesus.  Therefore, there is nothing we can do to make ourselves in better standing with God.  We can’t witness more, spend more time in the Word, do our work faithfully, have a cleaner home, or raise better children.  Our God is not fooled by our actions. 

So, the next time you fail in some way as a wife, make sure you don’t try to “earn wife salvation” by doing 15 things to make up for it.  It won’t work.  It doesn’t work in marriage and it doesn’t work in the gospel.

Thankful that the Gospel sheds much light on my marriage relationship.  Marriage isn’t how I can make up for the wrongs I’ve done, the Gospel has already paid the final cost by the blood of Christ.