Just for disclosure sake: I have permission from my husband to share this story. He said he learned a lot from it early in our marriage and he wants to make sure that others learn the same lesson for the good of their marriage!
We had probably been married three months or so and having oatmeal most of those mornings. I had always cooked my whole oats in the microwave. I figured that’s how you did it. I hit the button for 1.45 and let them do their thing. Mister gladly ate them and never said anything about it so I thought they were fine. Well, come to find out, he didn’t eat them that way. One morning he said something to the affect of I don’t like my oats cooked this way. I want them cooked longer and less sweet. I probably burst into tears when he said that. Why cry over oats?
I had been doing them wrong all that time and he was just now telling me? Some of you are probably saying what a sweet husband, not to make a big deal out of the small and eating them because he loves his wife. That’s a great response and that’s exactly what he did. But, that wasn’t good for me. You see…I want to please my husband, especially in the kitchen. I love to cook and I want people to love to eat what I cook. So, after I got done crying, I asked him how he wanted them and have tried since to make them that way. Yes, its a little more work, but it pleases him and he eats them and never comments on them anymore except to say “Thank you, can you make these every day this week?”
Moral of the story: if your spouse does something that irritates you or doesn’t please you, you may want to find a gentle way to tell them how you would like it. Marriage is for the long haul – you might as well be happy in the little things! Philippians 2.3-4 is a great verse for our marriage. We read it on the night we got engaged. So applicable! What I wanted to know is how to please my husband in the little things: how to fold his shirts, his socks, hot to cook his oats, make his bed, etc. I want to do these things to please him. If I don’t know, how can I please him?
Wives, ask your husbands what would please him? Make every effort to do these things. Husbands, please be honest with your wives! And thank her for cooking your food for you!
- 1½ cups uncooked oats (plus a handful)
- 1½ cups water
- 1½ cups whole milk
- 1 T raw honey
- 1 tsp cinnamon sugar mixture
- ⅔ cup raisins
- milk for serving
- Heats all on a stove top until boiling, stirring constantly, until desired doneness.
- Put in a bowl
- Top with milk