6 Apr 2015

Bedtime Traditions (and Giveaway)

by Kimberly | posted in: Books, Kids r Readers 2, mothering, parenting, Shepherding Children | 11

Do you remember what it was like to go to bed when you were younger? Did you ask for 20 glasses of water or want to read the longest book over and over again?

As my boys get older, I’m (usually) loving bedtime routines. I usually put the younger one to bed, and then get the older one ready. He likes to sit and read one or two books in the chair in his room. He gets really calm with his paci and sits in my lap and I read it quietly (with expression and voices) in his ear. We pray while holding hands. Then he hops down and goes to bed. I know this won’t last forever, but I think it is the sweetest thing and one of my favorite times with him during the day.

One of the books I’ve enjoyed recently with him is Really Woolly Lullabies by Tommy Nelson. Tommy Nelson sent them to me for a review, but all opinions are my own. We’ve enjoyed the Scripture on every page, the sentence prayer that helps me pray specific things for my toddlers as I’m putting him to bed.

Nighttime routines are important. They set a peace for the night that is crucial to my children, and probably yours. Enjoy this time with them, when you can. It doesn’t always work perfectly in our home, but it is getting better.

If you would like to win your very own copy of these lullabies, just leave a comment on here or on social media and tell me what your favorite song to sing with your children is.

30 Oct 2014

Daniel Tiger and Moral Behaviorism

by Kimberly | posted in: mothering, parenting, Shepherding Children | 0

The only show that my toddlers watch 5-7 days out of the week is Daniel Tiger. We only have Netflix so I can just put one on in the morning as I’m cleaning up from breakfast before we go out to do any errands or go to Bible study. Both of my little boys love it.

I do believe my older son’s first sentence was (in his own language) “Daniel Tiger rides a school bus”. School bus is his term for anything that moves that’s big. And my younger son does The Twist when the theme music begins.

I love that the show is based on Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood, which I loved as a child. Teaches good things to kids and helps them learn social behavior that is acceptable. My mister even was telling me the other night that he was able to put a Daniel Tiger song into practice during a conversation with some co-workers.

And I write this blog post from a stand point of a Mom who is in the throws of trying to get my two year old to behave. I’m trying to teach him about authority and what is right and wrong. When not to run away, why shoving his brother is wrong, how to share toys, why we don’t spit out food onto the table, why we don’t pitch fits when we leave time with Daddy at his store, why we don’t scream in the car long enough to make his brother cry.

Daniel Tiger is great at teaching what to do and how to be nice while doing it – playing nicely with others. Obeying your parents, giving hugs, etc. But, if that is all we teach our children as Christian parents, than we are missing the (gospel) boat entirely.

When my son disobeys, like he is right now because I’ve asked him to be quiet and play in his room or take a nap and he is singing and talking at the top of his lungs, I have trouble because I go to him and I say “I love you, E, BUT I really want you to obey Mommy.” When I should be saying “I love you E AND I really want you to obey Mommy. Here are some truths I’m learning about this way of parenting:

1. My love for my sons should not be conditional upon their obedience. I remember asking my Mom one time decades ago what she would do if I or my brother killed someone. She said I’d still love you, pray for you, and I’d turn you in. Good job, Mom! They should not have to work for my love or my snuggles. The Bible is very clear on this in Romans 5.10

2. Our children should learn how to have good behavior. Not by bribing, not by rewarding, not be yelling – but just because that is what is expected of them as one of our children. I don’t want to raise two little Pharisees, I want to raise little boys who see their need for a Savior. My Mister and I have been talking about this, especially now that our older one has gotten to a point where he completely understands what we are saying when we are trying to get him to obey. A sweet friend who is years ahead of me in parenting told me that these early years are for your children to learn that the parents are the authority. If they don’t learn that, they will have a harder time learning God’s authority. And that is where we definitely want to point them. One key Scripture is Ephesians 6:1-4

3. The main point of the Gospel is not so we will be better Christians. The Gospel is not there to tell us how to be good. It is actually the opposite. The Gospel tells us that we can’t be good and we can’t obey. The sin nature living in us makes us want to do our own things. Only turning our lives over to Jesus and relying on the Holy Spirit to shape us and live through us will work. Believing through faith is salvation. That faith is given to us. Out of a heart that has been changed will come right obedience. See Romans 6-8 and Ephesians 2.

4. We have to discipline, love and teach the Bible to our children through the eyes of the Gospel. We can’t teach them Bible stories that will lead them to share better, be kind more, or obey. We need to teach discipline, love, and teach them so they see Jesus in EVERYTHING. We must be the ones who share the Gospel with our children.

After all, that is our biggest job as Christian parents. Show the Gospel to our children. And pray the Holy Spirit will turn their little hearts.

29 Oct 2014

Grace and Peanut Butter and Chocolate

by Kimberly | posted in: Books, mothering, parenting, Uncategorized | 0

I’ve already reviewed this book for Crossway and I stand behind everything I say. But, in this post I want to encourage (mostly Moms) yall from some of the highlights that I read. I’m grateful for Gloria’s writing, examples, and Christ-centered encouragement to other moms in the world. Many things I could relate to – and no matter what stage of mothering you are in, I’m sure you can to.

“It’s tempting to view everyday life merely as a monotonous cycle of making the beds on to be in them again.” (63)

Don’t let life be mundane to you. I know we have to clean and cook dinner and change diapers and run car pool. But, don’t be ok with that. That is when life gets boring and we get discouraged. Make fun things happen, change your attitude – don’t live there.

“Controlling my circumstances wouldn’t fill the void in my soul. You can’t organize your way into communion with God.” (78)

I see this in myself a lot today. My littler toddler is sick. I can’t take them anywhere I normally go because he would be around children and I don’t want him to get others sick. So we are at home. In a small townhome, all day. Well, I can’t control that. Now I can either apply the gospel or live in a bad mood the rest of the day until they go to bed? It is choice!

“God is greater, more powerful, and more mysterious than we could ever dream, and it will take an eternity for him to reveal to us his magnificence.” (92)

God is our reward – not the perfection of heaven. He is infinite and no matter how much we seek to know him on this side of his presence – we will never know him fully – because He is inexhaustible.

“Our craving for admiration is diluted and the praise of others is muffled as we serve with the strength God supplies. Why would we take credit for the fruit of the Holy Spirit in our lives?” (105)

This is an area of biggest struggle for me. God is the one who does the work and needs to get all the praise for it.

“I need God’s grace and something baked with peanut butter and chocolate.” (138)

Perhaps my favorite line in the book!

“I forget that homemaking is not primarily about my personality; it is primarily to adorn the gospel because the grace of God has appeared.” (155)

Another one of those needed statements that I will need to think through.

This book is highly marked up and I’m shipping it out today to a friend who will also love this book. There are many other things I highlighted that I’ve talked about with friends or my husband because they bring up too much hurt from past relationships.

Mom – keep pursuing the gospel in your parenting! God has got this! Be encouraged!

23 Oct 2014

Teaching Children to be Readers

by Kimberly | posted in: Books, Kids r Readers 2, mothering, parenting, Shepherding Children | 1

Being a parent is amazing and hard and always full of new moments. But, this moment we are in right now is something I’ve waited for. “Mommy” then I get a little pat on my leg and I see my older toddler standing there in front of me with a book in his tiny hands. Begging for me to read to him. So, I do. Over and over again.

There is a certain train book from Usborne books (gift from Oma) that he has carried everywhere – coffee shops, hikes, car trips, gym kid’s club – and Daddy has even had to tape it up. It came with a little train – sometimes we can find it sometimes we can’t. But, no matter – he has other cars that will work on its tracks – or at least work for him.

One of the things I want to instill most in my kids (besides a love for God) is a love of reading. I love to read and I know how books take you to other places, teach you so much more than you could ever learn, and also put a desire in you to see the world around you. C S Lewis and L. M. Montgomery are two of those authors for me. I have a feeling the boys will love L. A. Wilder, C. S. Lewis, J. R. R. Tolkien, and Andrew Peterson. We shall see. Can’t wait to actually read chapter books with them at night. But, that is a moment in time later to come.

How can you instill a love of reading in children?

1. Use the library. We go to the library some for story time. My boys are harder to sit still than some others but we still attempt it and its good song and play time too. The public libraries, especially in bigger cities, are great resources (and free)!

2. Buy them books. Buy them at thrift stores, online book clubs, ask for them for presents.

3. Read to them. Use some time before bed, or after breakfast to read to them. It teaches them to pay attention and sit still but also helps stir up an amazing appetite to read.

4. Be patient with them as they learn to read. My boys aren’t to that stage yet, but I have to be willing as their Mommy to be patient, let them stumble over words, help them when I need to, and listen to them.

5. Encourage them to write their own stories. This time will come too. I still have the first book I wrote in 4th grade – all about animals. I can’t wait to show it to our boys. I hope they will love it and not laugh!

6. Read different genres. As a gospel Christian, I do like to read boys about Jesus to them. But…I love to read them other books about the world God created and things that happen in it and teach them about a Christian worldview – seeing everything through the lens of the Gospel. That is so important to teach to our children early in their learning adventure.

My friend Leah is an Usborne consultant. They have delightful and interactive books for children of all reading levels. Here is a link to an online party I am hosting for her. I have been pleased with the Train book so far – and so has our toddler. I’m sure you will find some your children like as well.

What are your favorite books to read to your children?

20 Oct 2014

Read This: Christ in the Chaos (Kimm Crandall)

by Kimberly | posted in: Books, mothering, parenting | 0

Sometimes it may take me a while to get to a book, but God knows why he had me pick it up at that moment. I’ve had this book for a while, and just really picked it up in earnest this weekend. As you can see by this review – I’m done with it and it has many underlines and !!! sections!

Kimm Crandall is a mommy of four – and a funny one at that – and one who knows her weaknesses and is steeped in the Gospel. And even though she has written a helpful and gracious book, she would probably tell you herself that she needs to practice and rehearse the gospel every day (even after she wrote the chapter on rehearsing the gospel).

I liked this book because she shared stories I could relate to – even though her kids are definitely older than mine. She pointed me not to my mistakes and where I fail every day as a Mom, but instead she pointed me to Jesus – who is perfect in every way and intercedes for me as my Great High Priest.

I liked it because it was short and practical – two things I need as a Mom to two active toddler boys.

I liked it because she encouraged women to be honest with other women – and to use wisdom in sharing – but not to hold on to this idea of perfection that we seem to do so well in many of our churches.

I would recommend this book to any mom but especially ones who are :

1. Like me, in the throws of teaching two boys what it means for mommy and daddy to have authority and how they won’t get everything they want just because they throw a temper tantrum.

2. Like me, who loves their to do lists and hates it when everything isn’t marked off by the end of the day.

3. Like me, who knows the Gospel but still needs help in accepting it every day and also passing along that acceptance to their husbands and children. Oh, ladies – how I struggle with that. Teaching my boys to obey and listen and accept authority – and doing it with the love of Christ in my actions, words, and tone of voice.

Here are some of my favorites from the book:

“God’s faithfulness is not measured by tangible blessings. It’s measured by his character and his promises to us.” (22)

“God’s grace leaves us with nothing of ourselves but all of Jesus.” (32)

“Grace is a mystery so disturbing I can’t bring myself to look away.” (44)

“When you know you are being pursued by a merciful admirer, the lure of sins’ crude pleasure loses it’s sparkle.” (51)

“Take off the strong mother mask and embrace your weakness. Stop hiding the very inadequacy God wants to use to display the Gospel.” (61)

“Everything in Scripture points, not to our obligations, but to our Redeemer,” (67)

When you live in light of the Gospel – you are set free from your incessant need for approval.” (93)

Live in light of these truths – grounded in the Word and the Gospel.

(Thanks Kimm for providing me with a copy of this to read. All comments and thoughts are my own.)

13 Oct 2014

Glory and Grace: Deuteronomy 6

by Kimberly | posted in: glory and grace, Kids r Readers 2, mothering, parenting | 0

Today my little boy turns one. One. Seriously?

And I think to myself I’ve had one year to teach him – to love him – to pour into him. What is he going to remember?

I hope he will remember the love, the kisses, the midnight feedings, the giggles and tickles.

What I hope he will always remember is that fact that his mommy and daddy love Jesus. We want him to know the truth of the Gospel. How will we do this?

We will pray that with endurance we will talk about the Gospel and live the gospel out in front of him and his brother every day they are with us. How can we do that?

Teaching him (as little as he is): the authority of God and His Word – and the love of the Father.

1. Use a chalkboard in your dining room to learn a Bible verse a week.

2. Sing songs in the car that speak of God’s love.

3. Watch shows that teach good things – and then talk to them about how the Gospel intersects with that.

4. Pray with them every chance you get.

5. Read Gospel-centered books to them – and teach them about God while reading any book you can.

11 Oct 2014

Let There Be Kisses

by Kimberly | posted in: mothering, parenting, Shepherding Children, Uncategorized | 2

I will be the first to admit of multitasking while my boys are awake. If they are playing, I am on my phone, cooking dinner, cleaning, reading a book, etc. And I’m not hear to lay blame on anyone else who does that. Rest in grace, friend. Walk in grace. Live in grace. That’s what my husband tells me.

Here’s what I am learning: let there be kisses. and tickling. and book reading.

My older son who just turned two is just now loving to bring me a book (usually the Wheels on the Bus) and pat my legs which is asking me to put him on my lap so I can read to him. I first told him no, then immediately was so convicted by the Spirit that I’ve not told him no since. It devastated my heart that I would tell my sons no to something as fun as reading a book to them just because I wanted to do something else. So, even today, as he finished lunch, he ran and got a book, and we read and sang and played with cars at the table while his little brother tried to hold his sippy cup and ended up getting more milk on him than in his tummy. That’s life.

Much of this denial that I give my sons is based on two things:

1. I think what I have my schedule is more important. Blogging. Writing. Cleaning. Being entertained with social media. It all comes down to pride. I don’t want our family’s schedule to be dominated by the boys – but I do want there to be much more book reading, hand holding, tickle fests than instagram feed reading. What do I want to communicate: verbally and non-verbally to my boys? That they are important and time with them is something I cherish – or that things and strangers are more important? What you communicate in your actions also gives you the door to speak the Gospel into their lives every day.

2. I try to fill our days with too many things. We love to be out and about during the days that Daddy is working. We’ll either go to the park, the mall, the zoo, Bible study at church, the gym, the river, etc. Atlanta is full of fun activities for families – so we take advantage of many of them. But, then when we are home I have so much to get done. I’m not thinking about stopping going so much – I just will have to limit what I think has to be done. I’m reading Challies’ series on getting things done and it helps me to realize that I’m not God and won’t accomplish everything. And everything doesn’t have to be accomplished. Energy is a commodity too.

My boys won’t be little long. The days are sometimes long and I look forward to having breaks with friends or solo times for being in the word or just running errands. But, I love their laughs and hand-holding. My Mister said last night that we better relish the times that they are excited to see us when we pick them up – because that always won’t be the case. I know it won’t be forever and my boys will stop wanting to sit on my lap for reading sessions, or stop laughing when I tickle them, or they won’t want me to kiss them goodnight.

Until then, let there be kisses. Everything else will wait!

7 Oct 2014

Glory and Grace: Lamentations 3

by Kimberly | posted in: Bible, glory and grace, mothering | 1

God’s loyal love couldn’t have run out,
    his merciful love couldn’t have dried up.
They’re created new every morning.
    How great your faithfulness!
I’m sticking with God (I say it over and over).
    He’s all I’ve got left.God proves to be good to the man who passionately waits,

to the woman who diligently seeks.

It’s a good thing to quietly hope,
quietly hope for help from God.
It’s a good thing when you’re young
to stick it out through the hard times

Lamentations 3 – The Message

I know several friends, many of whom are new mommies, that struggle with the day to day like I sometimes do. Our kids are small, our husbands work long hours, sometimes other jobs are also on our agenda for today.

My one piece of advice that I was given that I also share the most with these friends is this:

You only need to get through today.

God gives grace enough for today – and tomorrow, you know what, HE is faithful to give more grace and show us his radically new mercies that enable us to fight the enemy:

Exhaustion

Impatience

Fatigue

Worry

Fear

Selfishness

His mercies are better.

5 Oct 2014

kd316 photography: Fall Maternity Session

by Kimberly | posted in: mothering, photo shoot | 0

A beautiful park and a beautiful Fall day and a beautiful Momma and her family – made this a wonderful first maternity photo shoot for me. Thanks Jennifer for not having baby Cook yet and for sharing your life and family with me. Will be looking forward to meeting you cute new son and bringing you macaroni and cheese – because we know that that meal makes all things better!

My prayers to our faithful God for knitting your baby beautifully and for protection over the next few days or weeks. And strength – can’t forget strength!

30 Sep 2014

Starting Family Food Traditions

by Kimberly | posted in: food, mothering, parenting, Shepherding Children, Treasured Traditions, Truly Families | 1

Family and food. Those two words often go together for most people. Whether you wake up and cook pancakes on Saturday mornings, have a weekly pizza night, or always make certain Christmas cookies around the holidays – there are some things food always brings to the table. Maybe you always go to a certain restaurant for special meals, or maybe you have your grandmother’s recipe for gingerbread and her worn cloth apron that she would wear as she labored hard over her yeast rolls. Smell in the memories.

Growing up, we didn’t have a lot of these. We loved food – don’t get me wrong. There are a few things: smoked mullet, Granny’s chicken and rice, and Dad’s creole black eyed peas every New Years. Those are good traditions and I even introduced my mister to Papa’s smoked mullet a few years back. However, I want more.

As a wife and a mother of two littles, I want to create traditions, with the OK of my mister, that will do two things:

1. Provide a way to create memories for our family.

2. Help us to see the goodness of God to our family.

Here are three that we have started, and I will explain these two above points as we go along.

Weekly Pizza Night : making it, Little Caesars, store bought – just a night for pizza (and leftovers of course). Who doesn’t like cold pizza for breakfast. Hold the olives, please!

Weekly trips to Trader Joe’s and Ray’s Donuts. I am so grateful that my husband makes time to keep the boys while I go grocery shopping. I seldom go with them anymore because even if I’ve just fed them, they will eat the produce in the cart. Not going to happen. But, I like taking them to Trader Joe’s on Monday mornings. We get TJ cinnamon cookies, try new products, and make all the clerks smile. Building relationships. Its important. And happy boys. Also, we’ve started going to Ray’s Donuts in Marietta (amazing donut holes) one day each week. Nothing fancy, but good donuts. We spent 1.80 this morning, hung out with some friends who joined us, and ate donuts. It was so much fun wiping down my boys’ fingers with a wet wipe because they had glaze in between their little fingers and on the corners of the their lips.

Homemade Pad Thai for New Years. I am definitely southern and like greens and black eyed peas – but I wanted to do something different. So, last year the Mister and I said we would do this. I want to teach my boys to love it – and to teach them to love the different cultures of the world.

Our family is just starting out, but so far I’m building relationships that can hopefully spread into opportunities to share the gospel and I can teach our boys to be thankful for pizza, donuts, and pad thai. God is so good to us. Whether its an additional 5$ for pizza on a Sunday night – where we can rest and enjoy one another and not dirty up a kitchen – or 1.80 for a mid-morning, mid-week fun time with mommy with sticky fingers. These boys will have memories.

What food memories are you creating for your family? We will install more just waiting to see what yumminess!

mothering

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