20 Sep 2014

The One Thing I Can’t Do as a Mom

by Kimberly | posted in: Bible, mothering, parenting | 2

Failure. Usually a bad word in our family. My husband has often told me to remove it from my vocabulary. But, I think even my husband would agree with this.

I often find myself reading “mommy” blogs or parenting blogs or asking friends how to discipline or instruct their toddlers. I know families that have all boys in them (or mostly boys) and I would love to go on vacation with them just to see their family in action for a week or so. I know every family is different and every parents parents differently.

But, there is one area that I am a complete failure in – and I thought I’d be open and honest and share it with you.

I can’t turn my child’s heart toward God. There. I said it.

And you know what…neither can you.

Now, please hear me out.

I can teach my boys Bible verses, read them Bible stories, tell them about the gospel and how Jesus wants us to obey him and make wise decisions. I can hug on my boys and give them lots of kisses and show them affection: before, during, and after they need to be disciplined. I can love my husband and help them to have see a marriage that is striving to have the Gospel at the center.

I can put people in their lives that will help influence them to be more like God. I can tell them how to share and be kind and not push and shove and don’t through your cereal on the floor and don’t kick your brother and don’t bite. I can tell them not to run in the parking lot and hold my hand and all of it.

But, what I can’t do is change their heart. I can’t make them love Jesus.

Only the Holy Spirit at the will of the Father through the sacrifice of Jesus can do that.

The Bible is clear that God is the Master of Salvation. The Bible is clear that Jesus died on the cross to save sinners. It is clear that the Holy Spirit works in the lives of believers. It is clear that everyone is a sinner (even cute little blond hair boys).

Ephesians 1:3-14:

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places, even as he chose us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him. In love he predestined us for adoption as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will, to the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved. In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace, which he lavished upon us, in all wisdom and insight making known to us the mystery of his will, according to his purpose, which he set forth in Christ 10 as a plan for the fullness of time, to unite all things in him, things in heaven and things on earth. In him we have obtained an inheritance, having been predestined according to the purpose of him who works all things according to the counsel of his will, so that we who were the first to hope in Christ might be to the praise of his glory. In him you also, when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation, and believed in him, were sealed with the promised Holy Spirit, who is the guarantee of our inheritance until we acquire possession of it, to the praise of his glory.

It is also clear that we as parents have responsibilities to lead them to Jesus. To show them the gospel (by word and deed). To pray for them. To discipline them. To be Jesus with skin on to them.

Proverbs 22:6 – Train up a child. It doesn’t say change their hearts for them. It says POINT THEM TO JESUS

And oh, how I need the help of the Holy Spirit to pour life into me, to help it flow out of me – so that my children will be pointed to God. And we will pray that God has saved them by His wonderful, amazing grace.

This post is to encourage you. You can’t change your child’s heart – but you can pray and show them a God who loves!

8 Sep 2014

Motherhood is Not Just About Dying to Self

by Kimberly | posted in: mothering, parenting | 3

Motherhood, a joy, a calling, and a privilege – is also TOUGH! And I’m in the midst of it. New area (with relatively new friends), two under two – both boys, and a husband who works long hours – but is such a trooper at home and to take my many frustrated phone calls and texts and pray and encourage me throughout the day.

My boys are the most cutest (superlatives, I know) boys in the whole world. Their blond hair, big blue eyes, super long eyelashes – and their laughs, and smiles, and hugs, and giggles. Doesn’t that make all the disciplining, nights where there are 3 feedings, and saying no 100 times a day, worth it? Hmmm – of course, but it doesn’t make those days easier.

I was enjoying some hours of quiet courtesy of sleeping boys and a gracious husband and I wrote these next words. When I went to read it to my Mister I was hesitant too – not because I thought he would laugh at me, but because I don’t live this out – and he, more than anyone, knows it. But, it is the cry of my heart. And I need the Gospel every day and pushed harder and harder in on my life and my parenting – to look more like Christ in front of these littles that I call Lijah Bean and Bubba. I hope the next words are encouraging to you. Pray for the Moms you know. It’s a tough job.

The point of motherhood is not death to self.

If it was, we could be justified in our mopey days, our impatient attitudes, our temper tantrums. We could justify our need to be everywhere and do everything so we could earn the title of Super Mom.

It’s not about finding your life in your children. If so, we could warrant involving our children in everything so they could be good at what we weren’t. If so, we could boast in our children’s smiles, vocabulary, batting average, or report card.

It’s not about finding your life in all the things you multitask in – or the things you don’t. We could brag about our recipes, our photographs, or our pre-baby jeans. We could post pictures of our well-designed Anthro house that never looks like children live there.

It’s not about never doing anything you want to. We don’t have to live a slain and mopey woe-is-me life.

Instead, something I need to be daily pray for myself is that I would boast in the Gospel and die to sin so that I might life in and for and through Christ. On the days when I burn dinner, or feed my children all chocolate and junk food – I need Jesus. The days our son bites other kids in the gym child care – Jesus still died for me and loves me. On the day when I feel fat and don’t want to work out, but longingly look at the woman three treadmills away – desiring to look like her – Jesus still wants my heart.

I’ve read so many posts about you just have to die to self as a Mommy. In a way that is true – but not in its morbid-sounding worldly outlook. You can still ask for time for yourself – to feed your soul, to grab a cup of coffee, to grocery shop without toddlers eating the bananas before you pay for them, to take a walk, to exercise – to do things that refresh you – even if it is just to take a bath or have a date with your husband. These aren’t bad things.

If Motherhood isn’t just about dying to self – it must have a better end. We don’t die to self just for the sake of dying to self. We die to self and sin and flesh to live to Christ. Paul, in his letters, constantly wrote about not being the man he was but constantly fighting that battle and waging war with his flesh, but pressing on in Christ.

Motherhood – living to Christ – looks like:

Admitting when you are failing at motherhood and seeking help from other moms who have been there and done that. Not trying to put on an act like you have it all together and your kids are the poster children for all church kids.

Admitting when you need some “time off”. My Mister knows that some time off during the week does me a world of good. Writing, reading, praying, journaling, doing errands by myself, drinking unsweet tea, eating a macaron – whatever it is – as the saying goes “If momma ain’t happy”. He knows that me being refreshed is good for the whole family!

Crying out to God instead of yelling at your children. Even though I hate raised voices and I hate being yelled at myself – I find myself raising my voice at my boys – as if that’s going to do any good. I need instead to breath, pause, pray, and then speak in a manner to my boys that will glorify God.

Read the Bible in light of Motherhood. How does the Bible address teaching your children, being anxious or prideful in your spirit? The Bible has the final word on everything you could be struggling with.

He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, that we might die to sin and live to righteousness. By his wounds you have been healed – 1 Peter 2.24 (This verse was suggested by my Mister for this blog – and so fitting. If we try to do motherhood, or dying to ourselves, in our own strength – that is sin and it is futile. We will fail. It we seek the Gospel and the strength of Him who died for our weak, selfish selves – than He has promised He will ever be close to us in every moment of every tempter tantrum and birthday party and first date and bicycle riding lesson.

Motherhood in light of the Gospel – is still the toughest job, the best job, the most demanding job – and only with the strength of Christ will we survive.

20 Aug 2014

Toddlers and Edible Finger Paint

by Kimberly | posted in: mothering, parenting, Shepherding Children | 0

Combining two of my loves – my boys and food. What could be greater?

Usually we go go go out of the house, but when Daddy is home, we like to chill and do something fun together. So, I saw a post from a NC blogger and new that if I could talk my Mister into it, then we would be doing this. My Mister loves to be neat and not get messy, but I convinced him to put aside his neat and tidy ways to let us all have some fun and then we would dump our boys into the bath! So, an adventurous morning we had!

My boys are all boys – which obviously that morning didn’t involve finger painting. What did they do? They headed straight for the rocks. That is all they cared about. So, bring on more rocks!

With this edible finger paint – you don’t get art (because it doesn’t harden) but you do get fun times in the back yard!

Items you need:

Small containers to put the finger paint in (I used tupperware small square containers)

Sweetened condensed milk

Food coloring

Newspaper or tarp of some sort

Diapered kids (better than ruining clothes)

Spoon

I poured some of the condensed milk in each of the container and put in some food coloring into each one, stirring it up, and gave each boy his own containers so there would be no fighting over them. That helped.

Then we laid out newspaper on our back porch (read slab of concrete) and stood back to see what would happen? Neither of them went for it. I helped BabyBach a little but Elibuddy was definitely more interested in the rocks.

So, what do we do with the extra? We are giving it to our neighbor who has two little girls. She said they love to color.

This can be a great way to get to know your neighbors who have young ones. Just bring them all to the back yard and let the silliness begin!

Then we just took their diapered little selves straight to the tub and gave them a long soak and scrub.

So – how do I think about this as shepherding my boys: God is a beautiful creator and has given us many things to enjoy : finger paint and rocks! Let them get messy, be creative, and have fun. Its a way we were created to worship!

5 Aug 2014

Teaching Children Theology: Jesus Loves Me

by Kimberly | posted in: Shepherding Children | 0

Music. You know that song that gets stuck in your head and you sing it for the next 4 days…as you bide your time waiting for another song to take its place?!

Its a small world…

This is the song that never ends…

Any Christmas carol…

One of the very first songs that most church kids learn is Jesus Loves Me. Simple. Catchy. Memorizable.

As I’ve been singing this with my children as we sit at the table or drive around town (Atlanta traffic usually offers much time for sitting in the car…still…on the interstate or at traffic lights)…I always get stuck on one line.

“For the Bible tell me so…”

Such a powerful truth of this song that is oft overlooked – and one that we as Christian parents need to teach our children from the beginning.

The Authority and Truthfulness of the Word of God.

If you don’t believe the Word is accurate and truthful and without error in what it says – then why believe it? That is precisely why I hate political ads in our country. You can never believe what is being said. There is no use even trying to figure it out. The good thing with the Bible is you don’t have to figure it out.

God said that the Word is true, living, active, useful for instruction.

The best thing the Bible teaches us is the Gospel. No other way will we know that we need a Savior but by the Word of God. And if we don’t believe what it says than how are we to believe what it says about us, or about Jesus, or about his love for us, His Children?

So, while you have the chance (Deuteronomy 6), please teach your children that God gave us His Word and it can be wholly believed and rested upon as they grow up, walk with Christ, and serve him in anyway He has for them.

15 Jun 2014

Raising Godly Sons: Future Daddy Dates

by Kimberly | posted in: mothering, parenting | 0

Father’s Day is a beautiful tradition. In our world today, most fathers (especially the ones we see on the news and television and movies) are portrayed as worthless, deadbeats, sarcastic, drunk, mean to their wives, lazy, jobless, etc. That is not the type of Dad I want to show my sons. I’m glad I was blessed with an amazing husband who shows them what being a great dad is!

But, as a Mom to two boys – what can I do to really help them grasp on to what a Dad, a godly Dad, should be like? My parents were in town and opted to keep our younger and I took the Eli buddy along with me to run errands. I took this opportunity to start a tradition I will call Future Daddy Dates.

Here is what I did: I took my Buddy to McD’s and we sat and had a conversation about Daddies. Really simple. Not expensive. And being that he is only 21 months, not a long time. But one word it definitely was: Intentional.

1. Talk about who God has called him as a Daddy to be. Of course, I don’t know if Little e will ever be a daddy. He may never get married or have biological or adoptive children, but that is our prayer. So, I went through three basic characteristics of what a Daddy/Husband should be: protector, provider, and leader. He should protect his children as best he can from the harm of the world and teach him how to love his protective care – while also teaching his children to protect themselves. He should provide for his children. This means working a job, whatever it takes to provide for their needs. He should also lead his children. This means teaching them about God, leading in humility and service, and leading their home. The way I taught Little e about these things at McD’s was to give him examples of what his daddy does. Like hold his hand when crossing the street. Like working every day so we have food on the table. Like praying before meals and orchestrating Family Worship time and taking us to church.

2. I pointed out good daddy qualities I already see in him (even though he’s not even 2 yet). For Little e, I told him how wonderful it is that he is joyful, funny, and hospitable. These three traits are important for Daddies to have. He is joyful – most of the time with a smile on his face – a smile that is contagious. Funny – oh this life is hard and needs to have laughter in it. Hospitable – he makes other people feel welcome and shares toys. These base traits are great to have and will come in handy as he grows up.

3. I told him about his Heavenly Father. Little e is cute and funny – but he is a sinner. He was born a sinner – in need of a Savior. And He has a Father of Lights – giver of good gifts – who doesn’t change but sent Jesus to pay the price for his sins. He is a God who will listen to his prayers and protect him at all times.

How are you raising your sons to be godly men? Invest intentionally in their little lives. You have an important role in their lives as their mother. Use it for the sake of the gospel.

27 May 2014

KCreatives: Scripture Pictures

by Kimberly | posted in: creatives | 0

While I anxiously await the updates for this website and all the fun that it will bring – I want to introduce you to my creative side. I know you’ve seen it in photography and cooking, but now you will see it in hand-lettering (which I’ve always loved), calligraphy (picking up from my 7th grade days), and other art.

This is one that I did for a sweet friend of mine. I have several pieces like this around our home because another mutual friend did them. I love, like her, to get the Word into peoples homes and hearts. While I was penning this art I got to pray that a sweet little girl would grow up to love Jesus, make him known, and that she would realize that God made her beautiful – and wonderful. Most of our girls growing up in our society today won’t here that. I think we do need to tell every child that, especially now when they hear so much contrary to that.

How do you get Scripture into your child’s heart? How do you pray over your children?

And I accept custom orders. Email or contact on fb for order information. My Etsy store is KDCcreatives.

19 Feb 2014

The Mommy Laws

by Kimberly | posted in: mothering, parenting | 0

Freedom in Christ – to Christ, really – is a major theme in my devotional life this year. I’ve seen God bring it to my attention time and time again. Even as I was reading in 1 John this morning and thinking through some of Kimm Crandall’s book Christ in the Chaos, the theme came to the forefront. So, I wanted to talk about freedom from something – the Mommy Laws.

As a relatively new mom (I have two under 18 months), these laws are something that are new to me personally, but not something I was completely oblivious to before I became a mom. You may be asking yourself, “What are the ‘Mommy Laws’?” There may not be a written code organized by any governing authority, but there are many unwritten laws that change from community to community, family heritage to family heritage, and mommy to mommy. First let me say, the Mommy Laws I am talking about are not in the Bible. They are not infallible or inerrant. The Bible talks about the privileges of being a Mommy and how we are to point our children to Christ.

Here are a few of the ideas that can be construed as Mommy Laws – but even though you may not struggle with any of these, I’m sure you have some of your own:

Diapers will only last until your child is potty-trained. Do you cloth diaper or use disposable diapers? Does it really cost less to do one or the other, or do you do it based on convenience or how much you want to protect the environment? In some cultures and communities, what a mom decides on this one topic can allow her to be included or excluded in some play groups.

What you feed your child is not the most important thing. Breastfeeding works for some and not for others. But, whether you use the breast or the bottle or a little bit of both or when you start feeding table food and if it’s organic or grain fed or local – doesn’t matter. It is choice. Yes you do need to think about what you give your child to eat because all we eat or drink should be done to the glory of God.

Education is a choice. I know of a pastor and his family who decide each year, based on the life of their family and the personality and needs of each individual child, what schooling they will do that year. There are some Christian cultures that will not let you be a part of it unless you homeschool. There is wisdom in knowing what schooling option will be best for your family. You can still practice the art and obedience of Deuteronomy 6 no matter what schooling option you choose.

Skinny Jeans will go out of style. You don’t have to wake up every day and look like you stepped out of a magazine. You don’t have to lose all your baby weight by your child’s first birthday. You don’t have to take selfies with your hair all done and makeup perfectly applied – or feel horrible that you don’t do that. Neither of these make you a better mom.

SAHM is not a bad word. But, being a working Mom is ok now too. I know many moms who work outside the home and still make their families their top priority. I know women in the homes all day who don’t make their families their top priority. The Bible is not explicit as to what to do. The only thing it is clear on is that Mothers and wives are to make their homes and their families their top priority. Side note: the Bible is clear that one of the main priorities of the husband is to provide for his family. But, there may be seasons that the wife has to work part time or even full time for a season in extreme circumstances. God will give you family and you must be led of the Holy Spirit in these matters. Counsel from elders or other godly friends will spur you on to love and good deeds.

Ok, still some of these Mommy Laws may not make sense. Allow me to broaden it. The Mommy Laws are anything you feel you must do, pressures put on you from external societal norms or internal focus, that says, “If I do ______, then I will be a good Mom.” It is a form of legalism and idolatry. Neither of which belong in a Christian’s life.

So, how do we break our bondage to sin with strict adherence to these Mommy Laws? The good news is that the bondage has already been eternal won for us. Christ, with his perfect life, death on the cross, and miraculous resurrection, paid the penalty to free us from the captivity to sin. Now, we must stand firm in that, believe God in what He says, and live life according to our newfound freedom.

Worship. Sit down and pray about being a mommy. Meditate and praise that God gave you the ability and this time to be your child’s mother and how much of an amazing ministry and privilege that you have. Confess your weakness and how prone you are to living in bondage to these Mommy Laws. Pour out your heart to the Lord who made you and knows you. He knows what’s in your heart anyway, but it is so good to hear yourself say it (or see it written).

Make a list. What are the Mommy Laws that you adhere to? What laws are you in bondage to? What do you cling to that makes you think you a better mommy than those who don’t do as you do?

Pray over that list. I would encourage you to sit down with your husband and ask him about this list. Does he notice that you feel horrible if your list is not met at the end of each day, or does he notice a sense of failure in his bride? It would be totally freeing to rip up your list. Not throw out everything, but pray that the Lord would right your heart in relation to the items or laws on that list. The very last verse in the little letter of 1 John says “keep yourselves from idols.” This comes after many verses about what identifies us as true children of God. Obviously, we are commanded not to have idols as believers. These Mommy Laws are a form of legalism, which is idolatry. Something we do is going to make us a better person, a better mommy, make my child a better child, or earn better standing in my church, culture, or even to God himself. Idolatry is a matter of the heart.

Claim your freedom. After you have talked with God, talked with your husband, even gotten friends to hold you accountable to the laws on your list… Friend – claim your freedom. Believe God when he says that he freed you from working for your salvation. Nothing you can do or don’t do will earn you a better standing before His throne. And it shouldn’t matter in your community either. In Colossians 2 Paul starts talking about the fact that we are alive to Christ – but then follows it by commanding the Colossian believers not to let anyone disqualify them by secondary issues.

These Mommy Laws are most definitely secondary issues. These are not gospel issues.

Here are ways to live in truth:

Believe God that he sent Jesus to free you from the bondage to these.

In the midst of your chaos, choose to fight the lies of Satan with the Sword of the Spirit which is the Word of God – knowing that your position in Christ as a Sister, a daughter of the Most High King, is not determined by your adherence to your list of Mommy Laws.

Encourage others who are in a similar situation as you are. Don’t put outrageous expectations on her but encourage her to love the Word, seek Jesus, and do what she can to love her family and her Jesus.

Encourage Moms-to-be. I love Moms on either end of the spectrum regarding the “Mommy Laws” I talked about above. So, talk about your story, share ideas with expectant moms, especially if they ask, but don’t force your way of life on her. Encourage her creativity and freedom in Christ to love her children well.

Don’t compare. I spend a lot of time on social media. Looking at Instagram and Pinterest and other blogs will mostly encourage creativity and foster a desire to do and be and live and love. But there are some days that it fosters a discontent heart. On those days, I don’t throw out the computer or quit doing anything with social media. I pray. I write. I look into the face of my husband and little boys and see their blue eyes and dimples staring back at me…and love them and pray for God to work in my heart. Thankful on those days for verses like 1 John 3.20, “For whenever our heart condemns us, God is greater than our heart!” Thankful that He knows my heart and He is the only one who can change my heart in regard to these Mommy Laws.

Sing and worship and stand in freedom. God is not the Mommy Law police, and neither are we.

5 Feb 2014

Living the Extraordinary Ordinary

by Kimberly | posted in: mothering | 2

This is definitely coming out of a real place that I am right now and learning how to think through the life I’ve been given. It is also coming out of almost 3 weeks stuck in the house with two littles who love to be outside (the older one especially), but it’s been too cold to go outside and stay healthy (which is important)!
All three of my men are the joys of my life. I love them: cooking for them, reading them books, tickling them while changing their diapers (well, the youngest two). I love sitting on the couch at the end of a long day with my Mister. I love it when he walks in the door and gives me a kiss. I love listening to the littles sounds as they learn to communicate.
But, there are also little pleasures in my life as well – that don’t take away from my loves of my boys but helps me explore other avenues and gifts that God has given me. So, here are some things that I am learning.
1. Be content. The Mister and I were talking about the budget this morning. God has graciously provided everything we need for our health and enjoyment. Mister provides wonderfully for our family and we are being obedient with our finances. I must remember Philippians 4 and the verse that says do not grow weary in doing good.
2. Have fun in the every day. I love baking – so I need to bake more for my littles. I love Elijah’s face when he bites into a yummy cookie. Why not make some Walmart Crack Cookies and sit there with him on the floor with a sippy cup of nice warm milk right before his afternoon nap time or bedtime for that matter?
3. Don’t compare your life with others. I know moms of two or more who live in NYC or the PNW or the coastal cities (near a beach) who surf, sit down at sidewalk cafes, ride bikes through curvy mountain roads, play in creeks, etc. I can’t compare my life with theirs. I can’t compare my life with others who live here around me. I must live the life that God has given me.
4. Take delight in the ordinary. God is gracious to give us the every day. The every day that He has planned for us. We are to rejoice! He has given it to US!
5. Dream. I don’t think there is anything wrong with dreaming. Dreaming inspires me. Dreaming helps me to look forward to things. Not to take away from today, but to look forward to next year when our boys our older and we can do ore exciting things with them (like learn to ride a tricycle or buy a wagon they can both ride in)! Dream in color!
6. What works for me is to take great delight in my children, love on my husband, but also have other things that I love to do. Here are mine: writing (this blog and other articles and ebooks that are an encouragement to my soul and hopefully an encouragement to you who read them), take photography (so I have random photo sessions but I also take tons of photos of my boys, the food I cook on a daily basis, and our home. I love to send mail. Decorating little packages and thinking of others makes me happy. I can’t wait till the boys are old enough to write or color and we can add pictures to the care packages and they can write their own thank you notes. Cook. I love to cook and be creative with foods. I will be doing the Ladies Luncheon at our Missions Conference next month at church. It is a great way for me to use my creative food juices! I love to travel: so my husband sees to it that we get away occasionally so we can do that together. In April we will incorporate some of those together when we go to Louisville, hang out with friends, do some photo shoots, attend the CBMW National Conference (and photograph that), and play at new places with our littles. Finding ways to decorate our home is something I’m taking delight in and that is something new for me. It is fun. I love to read: so I read on my own time, and spend some time weekly to read to our boys and do a series of how to read to children with the gospel in mind.
So, find delight. Live your extraordinary life. Team with your husband to conquer the days that are never-ending and hard. Praise the Lord for the the joy of raising Littles. God delights in our delight.

30 Jan 2014

The Word of God in the Soul of a Child

by Kimberly | posted in: mothering, parenting, Uncategorized | 1

This is where I am. Starting to train up our older son, who is almost 17months and already has the “no” word down pat! Definitely his favorite word. Trying to change it to godlfish, chicken nugget, yes, or something better than no. Our conversations with our older right now are consisting of “God says to honor our father and mother. And we don’t talk to our mommy and daddy that way” – those conversations don’t seem to be getting anywhere with him – but hopefully one day they will.

One story from my childhood…I grew up attending a Christian school. And I loved Sweet Valley High books in the 6th grade. It was the thing to read in the fiction area. I think I had most of them – and never know what happened to all of them. I had loaned one of the books to a friend, who took it home and was reading it at night by flashlight as to hide it from her parents. Her mom found it, called the school, and I got in trouble. My punishment…to write out Scripture. I would tell you what Scriptures, but I don’t remember what they were. I think I mainly saw it as punishment then.

As I’ve come into being a parent, and shepherding our boys’ hearts with my husband, we definitely want our boys to have hearts that are soft to the Spirit. We want the Word to break the stony grounds of their hearts and give them hearts that desire to please The Lord, love Him, and make Him known.

How we discipline and parent has an eternal impact. Here is how.
If we think that just because we quote Scripture in our home, make them memorize the Word, even for punishment, or memorize Scripture at the table or in family worship – that our children are going to automatically love the Word and have hearts that obey it…we are wrong.
The Pharisees in the NT knew the law and obeyed it – but their hearts were far from them. There are many who know the right words to say but inside they have cold hearts toward the gospel.
Here may be a better way to parent with the soul of your child in mind:
As you have the need to discipline:
1. Pray for yourself as you need to discipline your child. Pray that your heart would be one of correction for the purpose of training in the fear of The Lord and not out of anger, inconvenience, etc. Your heart matters.
2. Identify the heart of the problem. That may mean you first have to stop the outward disobedience, but there is always a heart problem.
3. Know verses that correspond to these heart problems. Whatever heart problem there is – Scripture has an answer! The Gospel is the answer!
4. Tell them those verses with a humble heart. Be humble before your kids. We are all sinners. That will go a long way with your children.
5. Encourage them to learn these Scriptures – and you learn them along with them. That will encourage them that they are not alone in their sin journey – and journey in sanctification.
6. If your children have received Christ – talk to them about how as believers our desire should be to grow in godliness and have hearts that please The Lord. Not out of have-to but out of want-to.
7. Pray for your children. Pray, aloud, in front of them, that the Spirit would soften their hearts towards the Gospel. Pray they would come to serve God as The Lord of their life and that they would obey His Word.
8. Pray for behavior change – but more importantly heart change. And know and rest in the fact that you can’t do anything about the heart change. That is all the fabulous work of the Perfect Holy Spirit.

And in that, as parents and as sinners, we can rest!

11 Dec 2013

Hello December 11: Developing Gratitude in your Children

by Kimberly | posted in: parenting | 0

Or take one of the most popular fast food chains around, Chik-fil-A. Every time you get something from there you are left with “My pleasure!”. But, I know from personal experience sometimes the My Pleasure doesn’t come with a smile or even eye contact.

So, what are some ways we can instill this happy heart of reception into our children?

1. Encourage them to say thank you when they receive something.

2. Get them in the habit of writing thank you cards. Even before they can write, you can have them draw pictures or color something to send in a thank you card.

3. Say grace before each meal. Not the trite prayers that we often say, but maybe before each meal ask them what they are thankful today. Then, express that to the one who gives us all things by His good hand.

4. Interest them in the Gospel. Remind them that there is nothing they have that didn’t come from God and through Jesus Christ. Philippians 4 and Romans 8 are great places to start, Psalm 96 – so many ways you can teach your children about this!

“But thanks be to God for His indescribable gift!”

Especially at the holiday time, both Thanksgiving and Christmas – with gifts and goodies constantly being given and received, teach them from a young age how to have a grateful heart!

parenting

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